Better Marry A Redhead- Turns Out They Might Be Genetically Superior
Full disclosure: my wife comes from a family of redheads, all of whom are very proud of this fact. Maybe too proud, actually. The genesis of this article started during one of the marathon sessions where she read a huge list of wikipedia facts about redheads to me and how awesome they are for the umpteenth time.
Not that this is unique to her family- redheads as a group are quite proud of their red-headed heritage, as evidenced by the multitude of redhead t-shirts and other kitschy redhead apparel you’ll find everywhere. (Sadly, no one makes those for us ever-common brown haired folk.)
Irked at their high horse, I decided I would write a scathing (yet gentle) article about how redheads are actually a genetic dead end and that everybody widely agrees they’ll be gone in a few generations due to the utter weakness and inferiority of the redheaded gene.
(Maybe that wasn’t so gentle. In my defense, the list was really long).
At any rate, while looking up the evidence for my takedown piece, I discovered two things:
1) despite popular belief, redheads are in fact not dying out.
and 2)… redheads may, in fact, be genetically superior to their black, brown, and blonde haired brothers and sisters.
redheads may, in fact, be genetically superior to their black, brown, and blonde haired brothers and sisters
Let’s tackle #1 first!
if you’re not familiar with the claim here, let’s catch you up. Put simply, there is a common wisdom that redheads will go extinct because red hair is a recessive gene or because Scotland’s going to get less cloudy due to climate change. (the second one is a new one).
This has been oft-repeated, but is (thankfully) still wrong. First off, it is true that the gene for red hair is recessive. That in and of itself, however, does not mean it will slowly go extinct- since redheadedness is not an especially maladaptive condition- that is, it’s not a trait that makes it harder to survive, and so there’s no reason for it to be selected out of the gene pool.
Nearsightedness and color blindness, for example, are more maladaptive recessive genes, and they have thrived just fine. Even if Scotland became a sunny paradise, sunscreen exists and most skin cancer presents after childbearing age anyway, offering no barrier to reproductive propagation.
(Also, I have heard little evidence that climate change will make Scotland sunnier. That above article is the first I’ve heard of it.)
So redheads are here to stay, barring some sort of catastrophic, nightmarish genocide or unforeseen illness that only affects redheads.
The kicker? They actually might be better selected for procreation. A study done by the Université de Bretagne-Sud, in France, discovered that redheads are approached far, far less by men than by women- overwhelmingly, in social situations men will approach blondes the most and brunettes the second most, leaving the poor redheads far in the dust.
But upon deeper inspection, the research team discovered something interesting: the men didn’t approach the women because they found them less attractive. In fact, it was because they found them more attractive: they didn’t approach them because of fear of rejection, assuming the redheaded women were more assertive and temperamental.
So far from finding redheads to be ugly or undesirable, the opposite was almost true: they found them so desirable that the redheads were ‘out of their league’, so to speak. When asked to comment on the women they approached vs the women they didn’t approach, they rated the redheads more sensuous and promiscuous seeming- both signifiers that would possibly help in the babymaking arena.
So redheads are here to stay, barring some sort of catastrophic, nightmarish genocide or unforeseen illness that only affects redheads.
So that was out. Not only are redheads not going extinct, they might actually be well selected to thrive. But I continued in my quest undaunted. Redheads have lower pain tolerance, don’t they? And they take more anesthesia to sedate.
Wusses.
As it turns out, both of those are linked to a wider, far more complex gene than previously imagined. It’s not that redheads feel pain more- in fact, they feel a different kind of pain entirely. Redheads, for example, are more susceptible to toothaches and painfully cold temperatures- but they are entirely capable of withstanding more stinging and pressure pain than the average blonde or brunette. Additionally, in an incredible coincidence, they are better able to withstand the ‘fiery’ pain from capsaicin- AKA spicy foods.
And the anesthesia thing? It’s true- they need more anesthesia, leading to a pretty common fear of dentists among redheads. But their weird drug interactions don’t end there- for example, preliminary studies from the same team above show they are easier to treat with certain drugs than others.
The final conclusion that the Aalborg University study drew was that the ‘redhead’ gene (or MC1R for you scientistas out there) is far more intricate and complex than the simple blonde or brown haired gene, affecting far more of the body beyond red hair- in fact, we’ve only scratched the surface!
Interestingly, this has broad implications and could explain much of the cultural stigma against them beyond just having red hair. For example, redheads were often suspected of having magical powers or being witches- a stigma often levied at people that are genetically more intelligent on average (like left-handed people).
the ‘redhead’ gene (or MC1R for you scientistas out there) is far more intricate and complex than the simple blonde or brown haired gene
Redheads are almost-universally considered across cultures to be more assertive, confident, and capable- a recent study done by University of Tennessee and Dalton State College found that redheads are 4 times more likely to be CEOs than their demographics would suggest. It is very possible that the higher intelligence, assertiveness, confidence, and courage are not environmental factors, but genetic ones- meaning that redheads, far from being poor, almost extinct creatures, are actually far more evolutionarily suited to competing and conquering in our 21st capitalist environment.
So take heart, redheads- you may have been oft-bullied in your youth, but know that’s probably only because you might just be genetically superior to your bullies.
And me? Well, my wife has promised me that I have a place in her new world order- so long as I keep doing the dishes.
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